Dance of Joy
My husband travels for work a lot. Generally no where exciting, touring aging manufacturing plants and talking with banks. The only excitement is when I get the nightly check in calls detailing what enticing meal he ate (last night was "fall off the bone ribs"- a personal favorite of mine) and the occasional "cheezy trinkets from afar," generally purchased in the airport on the way home. His travel does not generally bother me, and I quite enjoy a night or two at home to catch up on my DVR'd shows.
Last night, though, I was a bit nervous. I had to change my pump for the first time, alone.
When I was on the pump about 10 years ago, I distinctly remember one instance of changing my pump alone. I was in my dorm room watching Oprah. I anxiously grabbed the soft set and started to jam it in. This was before they had any sort of inserter, and I was a slow shot giver. Two really bad combinations. Oprah started mumbling and it seemed like she was yelling down a hall...just keep pushing, caren, almost done... The room started looking brighter than it had just a few seconds prior....breath in, breath out, breath in....is it warm in here?
Next thing I knew, I woke up on the floor. I had passed out from having to change that stupid thing. And the worst part is that I didn't get the site in, so I had to do it again. I went off the pump a few months later.
Skip forward to last night. I had the pump all ready, was standing in my kitchen cleaning the site with my alcohol swabs. In my head I was reminding myself, I choose to use the pump to be a healthier person. This is my choice....I am big into self encouragement speeches.... I take the inserter thing and boom, it's in. Wait, I didn't feel a thing, it cant be in... I check again..yup it's in. It didn't hurt, it didn't hurt.... can that be right? I must have done something wrong. 5 minutes go by... still not hurting... and then starts the embarrassing, thank God no one is home happy dance.... I CAN do this, it is MY choice and it's going to be awesome.
Next step, insulin. Bring it on.
Last night, though, I was a bit nervous. I had to change my pump for the first time, alone.
When I was on the pump about 10 years ago, I distinctly remember one instance of changing my pump alone. I was in my dorm room watching Oprah. I anxiously grabbed the soft set and started to jam it in. This was before they had any sort of inserter, and I was a slow shot giver. Two really bad combinations. Oprah started mumbling and it seemed like she was yelling down a hall...just keep pushing, caren, almost done... The room started looking brighter than it had just a few seconds prior....breath in, breath out, breath in....is it warm in here?
Next thing I knew, I woke up on the floor. I had passed out from having to change that stupid thing. And the worst part is that I didn't get the site in, so I had to do it again. I went off the pump a few months later.
Skip forward to last night. I had the pump all ready, was standing in my kitchen cleaning the site with my alcohol swabs. In my head I was reminding myself, I choose to use the pump to be a healthier person. This is my choice....I am big into self encouragement speeches.... I take the inserter thing and boom, it's in. Wait, I didn't feel a thing, it cant be in... I check again..yup it's in. It didn't hurt, it didn't hurt.... can that be right? I must have done something wrong. 5 minutes go by... still not hurting... and then starts the embarrassing, thank God no one is home happy dance.... I CAN do this, it is MY choice and it's going to be awesome.
Next step, insulin. Bring it on.
posted by caren at 11:14 AM
5 Comments:
Congrats! And I love that Erkel (sp?) dance.
Caren 1, PumpFears 0
And I can totally picture you doing the Urkel dance when no one is looking
Congrats. Bring on the insulin!
Congratulations, Caren!
Yeah, I'd agree with Kassie -- I can see you Urkel dancing for sure.
I'm so glad to hear it went well. I'm hoping to start the pump soon and this is one of my fears.
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